Whats happened to me, i feel awful and hopeless? I used to be so popular!?

Im a 30 year old man and have smoked weed nearly everyday for 9 years and smoked it weekly 5 years before that. About 5 years ago i loved it and all i needed was to come home from work and have a few spliffs. I stopped smoking(weed and cigarettes) about 7-8 months ago because i was getting really bad paranoia, around my friends and my family. I had a few freakouts with my mates i thought they were laughing at me, i started to think i was going mad. One of the major problems is ive never had a girlfriend, i was in love with a close friend of mine 9 years ago but when i told her she led me on and broke my heart. I was devastated and turned to drink and drugs to make me smile. I always thought id meet my true love but now im having doubts ive had 3 1 night stands that left me feeling souless i lost my virginity to 1st! I dont see much of my mates since i stopped smokin and am poor and live at home, i drink more lately. My dad who used2 smoke wiv me is kicking me out soon. Life is joyless